One of the saddest things we witness in our third age is disappearance of familiar faces of friends, neighbors, acquaintences. Some die, some go for an assisted living facility, some move closer to their children.
There's a certain bench which whenever I happen to pass near it, I feel a twinge. It reminds me of two women, neigbours and friends, that regularly used to sit on it talking, gossiping, laughing. Sometimes, I would join them as they were a good source of the latest news in the area.
One of them died a few years ago; after that, the other one was not seen again sitting on that bench . She recently moved to an assisted living facility. She didn't want to. At her age (80) she was still in good condition and quite independent.
However, a divorced brother of hers who had to leave his apartment to wife and kids, came to live at her big house. She was not happy about that. After three years of having him around, she decided to sell the house. She gave him some money to find himself a place, and joined an assisted living facility.
She couldn't believe it. Leaving her house, turned out to be one of her most happy days.
I'm glad your friend enjoys the assisted living facility. I'm staying in my own home as long as I can. I'm way beyond 80. But I have it to myself!
ReplyDeleteThat's the spirit - staying at one's own home as long as possible.
DeleteOh my goodness what a positive story. I too as I get older see a lot of my friends getting sick with some serious things. Getting older is not for sissies. So where on your blog is your follow button? I am following you on Feedly.
ReplyDeleteRight. Getting older has many drawbacks, and life doesn't get any easy.
DeleteAmen to that.
DeleteI love cultures where people go outdoors and sit on benches and talk. I've been watching a documentary from Italy, where people also sit outside on benches. It's just lovely.
ReplyDeleteYes, it is a culture matter. In a warm country it's all year round. People outdoors, sitting on benches and discussing life.
DeleteThis post was very meaningful to me as it makes me more aware of the progression of life especially at this stage which I am entering.
ReplyDeleteIt's true - sad to lose those relationships. I'm so glad this lady found it to be a happy move!
ReplyDeleteSadness is part of life. This lady was actually forced to see it as a happy move as the brother greatly upset her daily living and at her age she had no really other alternative.
DeleteI am glad it was positive for her, It would not be so for me. I hope you are having a good day.
ReplyDeleteIt would not be for me too. She had to do the move as she was on the verge of depression bcause of her brother.She got good money for her house and it helped her get into a good facility.
DeleteSo sad she had to leave her house to remove her brother. Owning two stores we have seen regular customers who have moved on or passed away. The cycle of life. Janice
ReplyDelete"The cycle of life" - indeed so, Janice. We know that, and yet it makes us sad when we stop seeing those people we were once familiar with.
DeleteWhile that woman had a tough decision to make, in the end it turned out to be the best for her mental health. Too bad she had to leave her own home to do so because of someone else.
ReplyDeleteWe never know what awaits us at the corner. She lived a quiet life until her brother practically invaded her house (brought in even a girlfriend at some time), so she decide to act.
DeleteWhat a terrible story! I am glad she is happy elsewhere. People can be so selfish.
ReplyDeleteShe actually left her house not entirely of her free will, and that is sad. Hopefully her move was a good one for her.
DeleteI am glad she was happy with the move. It had to be a difficult decision to leave her home though.
ReplyDeleteI've heard a number of people say that. I suppose it can go either way and I'm glad it went well for her. But you're so right -- there are places we pass that always remind us of someone no longer there.
ReplyDeleteI can't help it. I'm very sensitive to 'disappearance' of people I used to know, and places / items that remind me of them.
DeleteI have lost so many dear friemds, too. Moving into senior housing is the best move my mom ever made, too. She became active.
ReplyDeleteNowadays, senior housing is quite versatile. Every senior can find something suitable to his financial means and way of life.
DeleteI was so pleased to read that your friend enjoys the assisted living facility.
ReplyDeleteAll the best Jan
I know only that she enjoyed the prospect of leaving the house and joining the facility. Haven't been in touch with her since.
DeleteSometimes happiness creeps us behind us, and is a delightful surprise.
ReplyDeleteTrue. Happiness is always delightful.
DeleteThere are many changes in life and losing loved ones and dear friends can change the other persons life in huge ways. Assisted Living seems to work well for some, not so well for others. I think ones outlook on life plays into it.
ReplyDeleteI agree with every word in your comment, Sandy.
DeleteBoa noite de quarta-feira. Obrigado pela visita e comentário. O que comemos hoje, nos garantirá uma boa velhice. Matéria maravilhosa, minha querida amiga.
ReplyDeleteProper nutrition is indeed crucial to reaching good old age.
DeleteHi Duta, I was glad to read the happy ending of your post. Each life stage must have its joys even the sadness and mourning give way to gladness and joy. It reminds me of your comment to me about `cycle`. (I replied with a word for you, about `seasons`, I hope it is somewhat near to what you were expressing! )
ReplyDeleteOk, I will tell the word here too! It is from Ecclesiastes 3:1! And somehow your post here reminds me of it too so I will share it, I am sure you know it!
For everything there is a season
and a time for every activity under heaven
Ecclisiastes 3:1
May we navigate the seasons of our life with grace and hope. I will add, also, a prayer for eternal life for all who are sitting on those benches, as when we know the joy of eternal life, Salvation in Yeshua, there is less sadness for the sorrows we may endure here and now.
Much love and blessings! I love you! ❤️
Shayndel
How very true! Each stage of life has its joys and sorrows. 'Seasons' is a fine word and close in meaning to 'cycles'. There's a season for everything, and may God help us navigate them successfully.
DeleteLove and blessings to you too, Shayndel!
I'm glad the situation worked out for the woman. Often, people are lonely in their own homes, and find more social interaction in an assisted living facility. I'm glad she had the courage to do what was needed.
ReplyDeleteSome people prefer their loneliness and keep away from social interraction. In her case , she had to get away from her brother, and she found the courage and the right way to do it.
DeleteTouching story.
ReplyDeleteYeah, life is full of touching stories, and they are right under our nose.
DeleteOh, how sad. I experience that sensation a bit when I take a stroll through the village from my childhood. I lived there for 21 years and it feels as though everyone has disappeared. Although, that might be a little exaggerated. I don't feel that way at the moment I take a walk, but when I later that day think about the people who are no longer there, probably living in a nursing home or moved to the city, then I do feel it. Sadness. You can't hold on to it, can you.
ReplyDeleteBut I also moved on with my life and made new friends. That's just how it goes
Feeling sad in these circumstances is inevitable, but that's life and, and we should learn to accept it as such.
Deletethat is so good with those happy ending;)
ReplyDeleteA happy ending - so it would seem. Mind you, it was a family affair - sister/brother, but even within families,people can get stuck with each other.
DeleteMy mother in law went to an assisted living and was ok until she fell and broke her hip and then was forced to go to nursing care. During Covid it turned out to be a disaster since they were short staffed and impatient with the residents. so sad for her final years in the BEST and most expensive nursing home in our area
ReplyDeleteHi, Judee. Sorry about your MIL. Covid caused a lot of unhappiness; it still does. To this day, places are understaffed.
DeleteBom sábado com muita paz e saúde. Fico feliz em dividir um pouco com vocês a beleza do meu Brasil.
ReplyDeleteThanks Luiz. Peace and Health to you too.
ReplyDeleteA good reminder to stay in touch with old and new friends. Even old blogging friends!
ReplyDeleteHi, Sharon. Good to hear from you. You're right, of course, about old blogging friends.
DeleteVery sad.
ReplyDeleteWhat I find sad is as told at the beginning of the post - the disappearance of familiar faces. But that's life.
ReplyDeleteIn the last few months of my dad's life he was living in an assisted living place due to a broken pelvis. It was a very nice place and they had lots of activities. Of course he was not well and did not enjoy it, but if you are still relatively healthy and can get around and you enjoy people it's not a bad place to be. But there is no place like home for sure. I hope she's enjoying her time there.
ReplyDelete'There's no place like home' - definitely. At a certain age, however, health starts deteriorating, and people who have no family at all, or near them , will end up eventually in assisted/protected places.
Delete